PREGNANCY, DEPRESSION, AND GALLSTONES
This is a story about one of the most challenging and personal times during my life. After several months of trying, my husband and I found out we were pregnant. I could barely contain my excitement, and immediately went to the store and purchased my first month supply of prenatal pills. A million thoughts ran through my mind, and at times it just seemed so surreal. To actually think, that I had a little baby growing inside of me.
The next couple months I was fascinated by parenting books, videos on labor, and etc. Just whatever I could do to prepare myself for the arrival of my little bundle of joy. I would daydream all the time and nine months began to seem like an eternity.
My “fairy tale” pregnancy took a turn for the worst when I entered my second trimester. My husband and I began arguing over little nothings on basically a daily basis. We were unable to agree on a single thing. To this day, I still don’t know or fully understand why at a moment which is supposed to bring a husband and wife closer, we were falling apart.
The arguments didn’t cease with time, and the emotional and verbal abuse became unbearable. I hardly recognized the man whose child I was carrying. And with the stress of our relationship and the pregnancy, I ended up extremely depressed. I ended up eating whenever I was sad, and food was my only comfort. Pizza and ice cream were my all time favorite.
When I was about seven months pregnant, my depression and new found addiction to food had taken its toll on my body. I had gained eighty pounds in seven months, which depressed me even further. In a normal and healthy pregnancy, you are supposed to gain twenty-thirty pounds. In the last two months of my pregnancy, I would often get excruciating pain. I had mistaken this pain for contractions and ended up in the hospital ten times during the last two months. It was a “false” alarm every time.
I was extremely confused. I was accused of being a drama queen and exaggerating the pain that I felt. However, I knew there was something was terribly wrong with my body. I worried that there was something wrong with my unborn child.
When I was nine months pregnant, I filed divorce papers because I realized I would not allow my daughter (at this point I knew it was a girl) to watch her parents in an unhealthy relationship. Also, at this time I found out that my husband had been having an affair my entire pregnancy, and in my eyes, that is unforgivable. This was by far one the hardest decisions I ever had to make, but also one of the best decisions I made.
My daughter was born happy and healthy four days before her due date. I cant possibly describe the joy I felt when I held my precious little girl in my arms. She has been the greatest gift and to this day, we are inseparable.
When my daughter was about two weeks old, I experienced the same excruciating pain and was extremely worried. All this time I thought it was pregnancy related, yet I no longer had her inside of me. I tried to ignore it and took Tylenol. However, it only got worse. I still recall being on the floor curled up in a ball vomiting non stop.
This was honestly the worst pain I have ever felt in my life. And yes, labor was a walk in the park compared to this. I never knew it was possible to be so helpless. I was rushed to hospital where a cat scan revealed that I had gall stones. They predicted I had developed them sometime during my pregnancy most likely due to my extremely poor diet.
I thought back to my pregnancy and how unhealthy I ate. I thought about how much I ate. Evidently enough to gain eighty pounds in a very short amount of time. Which looking back now, makes me sick to my stomach. I knew I deserved this pain I was going through because I brought it upon myself. We are only given one body, and it truly is a shame when we neglect it the way I neglected mine.
The same night, I was put on pain medication. And let me tell you, a little Demerol goes a long way. I went through a surgical procedure called laparoscopic cholecystectomy. Which is a relatively “non invasive” surgery” to remove your gall bladder. You are put to sleep, and wake up with three small incisions on your abdomen, and well- no gall bladder.
I spend about an extra day in the hospital, was given pain medication, and released. Since then, I’ve realized that I can not allow an individual to impact my life in such a way that I harm my self. And I did exactly that, I caused irreversible harm to my body due to my poor diet.
This is all now just a distant memory. My daughter is a very happy and healthy 3 year old, and I pay extra attention to making sure she knows and understands proper nutrition. The once in a blue moon Mcdonalds trips, she always asks for apples as a side and fruit juice instead of soda.
It really is crucial to take care of ourselves. And with our society today, where fast greasy food is so readily and quickly available, its easy to become a victim to the poor diet related health issues. So be careful! I can hardly wait to have another child because I know this time, I will care for my body and the experience will surely be a positive one.
As far as my ex husband is concerned, it turns out we were better friends than companions. We work together and make sure that we are great parents, and our daughter is our number one priority.
The next couple months I was fascinated by parenting books, videos on labor, and etc. Just whatever I could do to prepare myself for the arrival of my little bundle of joy. I would daydream all the time and nine months began to seem like an eternity.
My “fairy tale” pregnancy took a turn for the worst when I entered my second trimester. My husband and I began arguing over little nothings on basically a daily basis. We were unable to agree on a single thing. To this day, I still don’t know or fully understand why at a moment which is supposed to bring a husband and wife closer, we were falling apart.
The arguments didn’t cease with time, and the emotional and verbal abuse became unbearable. I hardly recognized the man whose child I was carrying. And with the stress of our relationship and the pregnancy, I ended up extremely depressed. I ended up eating whenever I was sad, and food was my only comfort. Pizza and ice cream were my all time favorite.
When I was about seven months pregnant, my depression and new found addiction to food had taken its toll on my body. I had gained eighty pounds in seven months, which depressed me even further. In a normal and healthy pregnancy, you are supposed to gain twenty-thirty pounds. In the last two months of my pregnancy, I would often get excruciating pain. I had mistaken this pain for contractions and ended up in the hospital ten times during the last two months. It was a “false” alarm every time.
I was extremely confused. I was accused of being a drama queen and exaggerating the pain that I felt. However, I knew there was something was terribly wrong with my body. I worried that there was something wrong with my unborn child.
When I was nine months pregnant, I filed divorce papers because I realized I would not allow my daughter (at this point I knew it was a girl) to watch her parents in an unhealthy relationship. Also, at this time I found out that my husband had been having an affair my entire pregnancy, and in my eyes, that is unforgivable. This was by far one the hardest decisions I ever had to make, but also one of the best decisions I made.
My daughter was born happy and healthy four days before her due date. I cant possibly describe the joy I felt when I held my precious little girl in my arms. She has been the greatest gift and to this day, we are inseparable.
When my daughter was about two weeks old, I experienced the same excruciating pain and was extremely worried. All this time I thought it was pregnancy related, yet I no longer had her inside of me. I tried to ignore it and took Tylenol. However, it only got worse. I still recall being on the floor curled up in a ball vomiting non stop.
This was honestly the worst pain I have ever felt in my life. And yes, labor was a walk in the park compared to this. I never knew it was possible to be so helpless. I was rushed to hospital where a cat scan revealed that I had gall stones. They predicted I had developed them sometime during my pregnancy most likely due to my extremely poor diet.
I thought back to my pregnancy and how unhealthy I ate. I thought about how much I ate. Evidently enough to gain eighty pounds in a very short amount of time. Which looking back now, makes me sick to my stomach. I knew I deserved this pain I was going through because I brought it upon myself. We are only given one body, and it truly is a shame when we neglect it the way I neglected mine.
The same night, I was put on pain medication. And let me tell you, a little Demerol goes a long way. I went through a surgical procedure called laparoscopic cholecystectomy. Which is a relatively “non invasive” surgery” to remove your gall bladder. You are put to sleep, and wake up with three small incisions on your abdomen, and well- no gall bladder.
I spend about an extra day in the hospital, was given pain medication, and released. Since then, I’ve realized that I can not allow an individual to impact my life in such a way that I harm my self. And I did exactly that, I caused irreversible harm to my body due to my poor diet.
This is all now just a distant memory. My daughter is a very happy and healthy 3 year old, and I pay extra attention to making sure she knows and understands proper nutrition. The once in a blue moon Mcdonalds trips, she always asks for apples as a side and fruit juice instead of soda.
It really is crucial to take care of ourselves. And with our society today, where fast greasy food is so readily and quickly available, its easy to become a victim to the poor diet related health issues. So be careful! I can hardly wait to have another child because I know this time, I will care for my body and the experience will surely be a positive one.
As far as my ex husband is concerned, it turns out we were better friends than companions. We work together and make sure that we are great parents, and our daughter is our number one priority.