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I Wish I Could Be Einstein

Ever since I was a child, I have always felt like I was extremely intelligent.  In Elementary School, I picked up reading faster than the other children, and I wasn't long before I was reading 900 page novels at a college level.  This was when I was in the second grade.  I also picked up mathematics faster than the other children as well, it just seems as if I had a knack for school. 

However these gifts weren't given without recourse.  Many times I had an extreme lack of focus and motivation.  Even with the ability to easily do the work, or participate fully in class, I chose not to.  I didn't feel as if I was lazy, I just didn't know how to succeed.  In my later years of life, I was diagnosed with a condition called A.D.H.D.  I attribute my lack of focus, lack of  motivation, and poor organizational skills to this disease of my brain.  To treat this condition, I was first given Ritalin, but than I graduated to a much stronger ADHD Drug called Adderall. 

When I first started taking Ritalin, it gave me a focus that I never had before.  I was able to complete my work on time with A quality, and consistently as well.  It didn't give me any harsh side effects as others have stated, but after a while it stopped working.  Even when it did work, it almost felt like my mom nagging me to do my HW.  The motivation didn't come from within, so I decided I needed a change.  My doctor was going to give me a higher dosage, but instead I opted for a different medication called Adderall. 

When I started taking Adderall, it was like a miracle drug for me.  I felt almost as if there was a laser beam from god shining on my HW to be finished.  I excelled a lot better versus when I was on Ritalin.  The only downfall to this medication was that I felt that it took away all my creativity.  Normally when I write essays, I am a great writer, and the words just seem to flow onto the paper.  However with Adderall, sometimes I feel as if I'm wearing blinders and not able to think properly and fully.  Essentially this drug was not allowing me to see outside the box, it gave me tunnel vision.  No longer was I writing masterpieces, but merely boring papers that had no grammatical errors at all. 

Even  my character, and personality was affected by Adderall.  My girlfriend has grown to love me as the wild rambunctious person that I am off of ADHD Medications.  I used to be wild, and say off the wall random things.  She was used to that, and she loved to be around me when I was like that.  However on Adderall, my girlfriend describes me as dull and boring.  Often times she tells me she misses the crazy funny person that I am, and she cant stand the boring person these medications have caused me to be. 

Due to these repercussions of the medications, I have since decided to only take them sparingly.  I know I can excel in school without them, but sometimes I feel like I need to take my medication or else I will not do well.  What I hope you get across from this excerpt of my life is be the person who you want to be.  I started taking this drug in hopes that it would make me a genius, but forgetting I was already smart to begin with.  I can succeed in school and life without this drug that turns me into a zombie.  As long as you are happy with who you are, that is all that matters.